Chapter Ten


Gordon phoned me next day at work.  Luckily I was on my coffee break.  He seemed cheerful and was very complimentary about Sophie and thought Chakka was simply stunning, even though, as he put it, she was black.

“Wow”, he said, “you certainly know how to pick them.”

He related that Emily had allowed him back into the flat and that everything is hunky dory again – he said making up had been so passionate it almost made the break-up worth it.  He didn’t apologise for messing up my week or for his drunken behaviour but that’s not his way.  He did say he been invited to go sailing with Bruce and one of his friends in June and that he would try to wangle a space for me too.  It was nice to hear from him and I was relieved he wouldn’t be dependent on me again in the near future.

I didn’t tell Gordon, it’s too early to share this, but I think I’m in love.  I feel so happy.  I firmly believe that the intimacy a couple have when there’re making love is an indicator of how they feel about each other.  If they are singing from the same hymn sheet and are aware of the other person’s feelings so they both reach an uplifting climax that indicates they have a good relationship.  That’s why I believe I’m in love.  We have made love very successfully.  After each time I have felt strong and manly and Sophie has told me she has never enjoyed sex so much.  And I don’t think she’s saying that just for my benefit.

That’s not to say I don’t have qualms about our relationship.  We come from such different places we will each have to compromise in lots of ways if we’re going to make a success of it.  I’ve yet to meet Sophie’s father and from what she’s told me about him that could be tricky.  He’s an ardent capitalist and member of the Tory party.  He’s separated from his wife and lives with his ‘fancy woman’ as Sophie calls her.  Sophie may reject a lot of what he stands for and think my way of life wonderful but I’m not sure if that’s not just because she wants her independence; to escape from her overbearing father.  When she’s done that she may find that actually her beliefs and way of life are actually not that different from her father’s.

And I question my motives.  I find the idea of being driven around in a nice car quite attractive and Sophie is glamorous.  She’s just invited me to David Cannon’s 50th birthday bash and it sounds as if it’s going to be quite an occasion.  I have to confess I’m looking forward to being served champagne, followed by gourmet food and fine wines.  Not something I get everyday or ever if I’m honest.  I’m not sure about the dressing up bit.  Will I be sucked in by this good living and become a capitalist myself?

Anyway it’s early days in our relationship.  I have to learn to just enjoy it while it’s good and not worry too much about the future.

I finished work today and it’s back to college tomorrow.  I enjoyed my job and I’ve earned over a grand.  If I hadn’t worked there I wouldn’t have met Sophie.  Any way now I must concentrate on my finals.  I’ve warned Sophie that I will need to do some serious revision over the next few weeks and that I won’t be able to see her as often as I (and hopefully she) would like.  I’ve told her she can FaceTime me after 23:00 on the other nights. I’m seeing her this Wednesday and then on Saturday for this posh bash.  It’s not going to be easy to connectors as my thoughts keep drifting to Sophie.  It’s difficult to think of anything else.